Here Come The Bad Guys

HERE COME THE BAD GUYS
by Christian McHausenstern

They did not emerge from darkness. They had been here the whole time. A federation which had become a stable battleground was ruled by a man like David Finn, the CW division was floundering, the Tag Division was ruled by an unbeatable line drawn in the sand, and the Ultimate Champion was perhaps the greatest wrestler in the EWF never to hold the EWF title. The central theme to this time, barring perhaps Finn's reign which saw a number of eras pass through it, was the law and order provided by Captain America and the Untouchables. The message last night, resounding in it's scope and clarity; Here Come the Bad Guys.
It's been a long time that we've had an evening so dominated by the villains of the EWF. The Doggpound, seen at first as a nuisance, has done what no one has done since the Halycon Days of the Lords of Darkness. They've united and divided. They've united the fans and wrestlers in their abundant hatred of this successful group. They've divided those who would oppose them along lines of loyalty, past transgressions, and the covetous power of a title.
The most cruel and effective example of how cold and calculating intelligence is just as important in the wrestling world as brute strength or technical skill is Dean Nyquist's strategy last night in the CW division. He would face three men in five minute matches, the man with the highest score wins. He picked Nancy Preston for his first match. This was wise. Preston, who I still believe could surprise some people, is no great point scorer. The judges I spoke with explained that her natural lack of power does not afford her the move set one most desires in the circumstance. Nyquist, the seeds of his plans in place, gets an easy round 1. Though close in points, Nancy's light touch which needed more time to develop never put Nyquist in any danger. His second match was closer, but the agile mind of the True Genius of the EWF had him attack a tired Marquis immediately following his sporting contest against the number one contender for the CW title Caesar Rivera. Out of breath and dazed from his loss to Rivera the Marquis fought valiantly but inconsequentially to the determined champion. The Frenchman's inability to follow up on momentary advantages cost him victory in the points game. Then came the great screw job. A moment that fans will remember and remember and remember. Every great champion needs a great foil. Someone from whom their legacy will be sealed. For men of honor it is a great opponent in the ring. David Finn's wins over Bu Jo Mon and Han Zo Mon made him legend. For men without such honor it is the delight in torturing and leading their opponents. It is temporary promise and falling crushingly unfulfilled. We all know the greatest foil in this federations history, and we all know which side of that cat and mouse Dr. Acula was on.
The tables have turned. The scope and perspective of what occurred last night is still difficult to wrap the mind around. Dr. Acula began his evening fighting the Dread Ninja Han Zo Mon, student and now teacher himself. The two were engaging in a terrific match of known skill. Counters and deep understandings of each others arsenal was creating a stalemate. Only now, in the light of a new day, can we understand the psychology born throughout the contest. Bu Jo Mon interferes. An understandable moment. These three men have been linked for years, both former students at the feet of the great Sensei. Both dangerous. Both ninjas. Bu Jo Mon's entrance into the ring distracting Acula from his goal. He and Han Zo Mon make quick work of Bu Jo Mon, they thrust him from the ring. They celebrate together! The insidiousness was not clear then. Acula, now seeing his beloved student and not his opponent seems almost disconnected. Perhaps he's thinking to the next fight against Nyquist? His momentum has been stymied by Bu Jo Mon's appearance. Let us pause and reflect for a moment on the arrival of Don Edwards. He repels to the ring, bat in hand. He sees his former enemy. He pauses just a moment, and attacks Han Zo Mon. He attacks Bu Jo Mon, he is quickly thrown from the ring, but the question hangs in the air. What did Don Edwards know and why did he arrive to help Dr. Acula?
The questions don't matter as much as the answers on this night. Acula loses this match, it's close, but he loses. The match goes longer than it most likely would have. Dr. Acula is winded, and something else. He is thrown. He is thrown by something, and he can't put his finger on it. No one would till the end. Nyquist, seeking competitive advantage once again enters the ring immediately. But here's the surprise. Here's the moment of true true surprise. Dr. Acula is winning. The hero is defeating the obfuscating champion. No longer can Nyquist dodge the great former champion looking to reclaim glory. Except that the True Genius has one last trick up his sleeve. Interference. A run in from the Yu Nugata Frank, the only other student of Dr. Acula. The only other one. Acula loses. Mr. Nyquist has solidified the legacy of what is being called the Brilliance at the Balls.
It was not until the main event that the circle closed, as it must do when history is made. Bu Jo Mon's mystery opponent is, as you and billions of others now know, Han Zo Mon. The Dread Ninja has rejoined his brethren. They stand together, and though they lose, the signal to Dr. Acula is clear. You never had a chance.
Years ago a team was hung from the rafters like so much meat. Their erstwhile young champion had closed the circle and began a reign that we never thought we'd see again. Except that it is happening again. The gauntlet thrown last night, the Doggpound's victories in the Ultimate Division and Nyquists incredible play in the Cruiserweight division give them the evening and beyond. The battle won in the main event has stemmed the tide, but for how long? Here come the bad guys? No wait, they're already here.